Thankfully, with everything going on in the world, there are plenty of quirky charity sector stories to keep Diary – and its beloved readers – entertained and distracted from fears of global apocalypse.
For example, creative agency TBWA\MCR has created the “world’s first digital out of home (DOOH) advert to be controlled by a bum”. (By which it means the posterior part of the anatomy, not a character from a Kerouac novel.)
Yes, you read that correctly. And if you’re honest and really think about it, Diary wagers that you can’t recall a previous DOOH advert to be controlled by a bum, so it must be true.
This is for prostate cancer charity Prost8.
Around 12,000 men die of prostate cancer every year. And while early detection could slash deaths by 40%, men are avoiding prostate tests, mistakenly thinking it involves a finger up the bum. Dodge the Finger aims to correct that misconception by telling them it’s just a blood test.
As it’s primarily targeting men aged 50+, it brings together the two things they like, apparently: humour and arcade games.
The centrepiece is a retro-style playable game which invites players to control a virtual bum with their own backsides to avoid the fingers as they move across the big screen.
Now, obviously, Diary is far too mature to go straight to the bottom, humour-wise, and make the story the butt of all its jokes, but given Diary’s ineptitude at video games, there would certainly be concerns about a bum steer.
Wild nights in Clapham
The other means of blocking out the news is to go out and let whatever remaining hair Diary still has, down.
Obviously, Diary cannot reveal precise locations of its partying for fear of paparazzi reprisals, but there have been rumours that Clapham, where Civil Society Towers is based, has seen Diary shake many a shoe.
Which is why Diary was intrigued to hear that Australian actress Margot Robbie has admitted to being excluded from most of the clubs in Clapham.
Speaking on the Table Manners podcast, the star of Wuthering Heights, who used to live in the south London suburb, would not divulge why she and her friends had incurred the wrath of the venues, but did admit that “for a while, we were banned at a number of places”.
Diary isn’t going to confess to how many Clapham establishments it has been barred from. However, it can admit that there are nights when a friendly taxi service home would have been useful, especially if operated for a good cause.
So, you can see why the following headline caught its eye: “Pub owner who was dropping merry punters home in his taxi for donations and raising money for charity is banned from offering lifts by jobsworth council”.
According to the Daily Mail, which is always a useful caveat in case the facts are later found to be inaccurate, Paul Hartfield, who owns the Flying Horse in Smarden in Ashford, Kent, has raised hundreds of pounds for charity by asking customers to make small donations to the Motor Neurone Disease Association for using his cab.
He didn’t make a profit from the taxi service, which he hoped would help punters get home safely, and chose the charity because one of his regulars had been diagnosed with the disease.
Mean spirited
But Ashford Borough Council (boooooo) decided to shut the not-for-profit service down after a local newspaper article highlighted the landlord’s charitable work, according to reports.
Hartfield was told by the authority’s licensing team that he was subject to requirements for local authority licensing because his black cab was a private hire vehicle, despite the landlord not personally benefitting financially.
He explained that customers of the Flying Horse, which dates back to 1790, were simply asked to make a charitable donation for using the taxi.
A council official reportedly wrote back, telling him a person can be said to derive commercial benefit, even if a payment isn’t made to him.
Hartfield said the council’s decision to put a stop to the service was mean-spirited.
However, a spokesperson for Ashford Borough Council told the Daily Mail that while it recognised the good intentions behind the pub taxi service, “the council must balance good intentions with our regulatory responsibilities as the licensing authority”.
The council has provided the business with details about private hire licensing in order to comply with current legislation, and said it is “open to assisting the pub if Hartfield applies for the licence”.
Let’s hope common sense prevails as otherwise, creative charity fundraising may seem to have received a bum deal.
